Have you ever been wrong to think that certain behavior patterns of your partner could be a signal of an affair? Often, our loved ones show some habits that may annoy us, but are not really a signal. It could just be a sign that they are asking for space or creating a space for themselves separate from your connection.
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This is not a red flag!
Therapist and licensed professional counselor Jeff Gunter talks about this in his latest video. He shared 5 things that might look like relationship anxiety, but are actually pretty normal. From sleeping in different places to sometimes missing each other’s company, if you’ve ever thought of these habits as red flags, you might be wrong. Jeff explains 5 times when you might think a habit is a signal, but it’s actually “pretty normal.” Here’s what Jeff had to say:
1. Some conversations happen via text rather than face-to-face.
It’s 2025 and texting is just a part of life. Some more difficult or awkward topics are safer to start with typed words. Just don’t let it replace all personal dialogue. If texting gets you up, embrace it. A digital wall can create a unique sense of security.
2. It is difficult to perform on demand.
You are human, not a robot, be kind to one another. Sometimes you can’t have sex with each other because sometimes you’re not in the mood because the world is literally on fire, and sometimes you’re not in the mood because you’re just not in the mood. It’s that simple.
3. Sometimes bored with each other.
Predictability often leads to boredom, but it can also create a safe, stable foundation, even if it can be boring at times. Boredom can be a sign that you are comfortable in your relationship. Just remember to leave room for spontaneity wherever you can.
4. Need or desire for different sleep schedules or sleeping space.
Believe it or not, separate sleeping areas can actually help some couples feel happier when they’re awake, and let’s be honest, compromising on the benefits of sleep sucks. Try sleeping alone for a few days and tell me you don’t feel completely blissful.
5. Not being each other’s primary source of ALL emotions
Too much work to be honest. Spread the support. Maybe you prefer to talk about finances with a knowledgeable friend rather than a partner who doesn’t make sound financial decisions, or you share family struggles with a sibling who has also had a front row seat to family trauma. Spreading emotional needs around is healthy. Rely on your village!
Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice.
