Are you thinking of going exclusive with that special someone? When the dating phase with the person you’re seeing is going great, we often think about making things exclusive and starting a relationship. However, according to Jeff Gunter, a licensed professional counselor, there are 10 questions you should ask your sweetie before becoming exclusive.
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Questions to ask your partner before going exclusive
In a video titled “10 Questions to Ask Your Sweetheart Before You’re Exclusive,” Jeff lists all the questions he thinks partners should ask each other. They are –
- What is the definition of cheating?
It is important to know the definition of your cheating partner, both physical and emotional. “Be very clear because sometimes we have very different ideas about what constitutes cheating. Talk about flirting with other people, liking hot beauties on social media, and watching hot videos,” the consultant explained.
- What kind of relationship do you want?
Find out if the person you want to be exclusive with wants a monogamous, monogamous, poly, open relationship or wants to open up in the future. Know their plan.
- How do you feel about living together?
Jeff suggested asking your partner about their understanding of life together. “Is that a goal for you, or would you prefer something like living together separately? Do you see the move as just testing the waters, or does it mean we’re definitely on our way to marriage?” he said.
- What wild things do you like in the bedroom?
Remember, the goal is not to be too silly or too young. You just want to understand what to expect when things heat up. It can give you something to look forward to or time to mentally prepare and get down to business,” the licensed counselor explained.
- What worries you most about us?
He explained: “You’re probably worried about where things might get complicated. Put them on the table and see if we can talk through them. Maybe they’ll calm you down, or maybe it’s something we’ll have to accept together.”
- Are you ready to be my primary emotional support and what does that look like for you?
The counselor suggested finding out if your partner is ready to be your primary emotional support. And if they don’t, find out if they’re okay with you relying on your community instead of them.
- What are you giving the most energy to right now?
Jeff said that understanding this can change over time, but it’s important to know what drains your partner’s energy. Find out if it’s “school, work, creativity, your relationships, family, friends, partying, or breaking the system.”
- Does anyone else think they are in a relationship with you right now?
This question is different from the question “Are you currently in a relationship?”. But, according to the counselor, you should also ask your partner about it. Also include the question, “Are you in any relationships, situations, or current love triangles?”.
- What do you think is important for me to know as we move forward together?
According to Jeff, this is an open-ended question for a reason, as it allows you to see where your partner’s conversation will go. This definitely leads to some really honest and insightful answers.
- Should we skip all these questions because they will make us rethink everything and drive us crazy before we have a chance to enjoy it?
According to Jeff, this should probably be the first question you should ask your partner.
Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice.
