November 24, 2024 at 17:12 IST
It’s more common than you think, and appears to be a byproduct of technology’s impact on the dating landscape.
Technology has changed the dating landscape, from dating apps popping up every day to new social media trends like Get Ready with Me for a Date. Dating apps in particular have unleashed the potential of countless different matches. But in retrospect, this creates a static stage in the relationship, forever stuck in the conversation stage. A study published in the Journal of Couple and Relationship Therapy revealed this tradition of chatting online even before dating. This is how this “just talking” stage is an unwanted anchor for your relationship.
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Low commitment
Researcher D. Scott Sibley explained that this stage of simple conversation is a way to keep things light and casual without giving a commitment. And it slows down the dating process more than the traditional pace. Lacking a clear vision of the relationship, allowing ambiguity to take the wheel.
The researchers found that many of their participants preferred the traditional way of dating to the simple conversation stage, but with the intrusion of digital technology, it inevitably slips and lingers at the simple conversation stage. Researchers have described social media and other digital technologies as “filtering” the relationship process. He added that factors such as fear of rejection and a desire to keep options open contribute to this trend. The fear of being rejected is one of the main reasons behind this trend, as they have options before putting all their eggs in one basket.
D. Scott Sibley added a snippet from one of the research participants. “Previous generations probably didn’t just have conversational stages. Now people, I think, are more afraid of commitment and like to… explore their options. This is why I think the simple conversation stage is so common. It’s what people do now before they start dating, or even if they’re just talking and it doesn’t work out… I just think it’s really interesting how much the norms have shifted.”
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Here to stay
The researchers explained how vital it is to identify relationships rather than drift aimlessly. This involves discussing the way forward and making commitments. However, they noted that this trend will continue and is not necessarily a negative one, as this pre-dating behavior helps screen potential matches for true compatibility. However, they warned that it slows down the relationship process, delaying the future of the relationship, such as marriage.
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